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Have you ever gotten one of those phone calls, and you just know that something is wrong? Well, that’s pretty much what happened to me on Sunday. My little sister called, and I just asked, “What’s wrong?” There was a long pause, followed by the news that our long-time neighbor and friend had died.
Having served on the school board for twenty-five years, he had the privilege of handing out hundreds of diplomas. I can’t remember what we were laughing about as Robert handed me my eighth-grade diploma. The photo is from May of 1992.
The Smiths and the Howells had some good times together. Lots of dinners and kids playing. Honestly, I think the Howell kids just liked us because we had a pool. Living so far out in the country, we didn’t go to Pratt every day and the summers were a great time to get together and play. Both families even went snow skiing together. What a crazy time that was.
Once his daughter Ashton was jumping over my brother and broke her arm. (We are still not 100% sure what really happened.) Sam got in trouble once and was not allowed to go to the high school football game. He had to stay with my parents when he was in middle school and had a good time despite being in trouble. The Howell kids discovered The Walton’s TV show at my parents’ house. I babysat for mainly Ashton and Alayna, and learned a lot about kids. I had instructions to put Alayna in her bed and just let her take a nap. It was so hard listening to her cry. I had to get lunch ready for Robert and any of his hired men in the summer. Luke and I attended church with the Howells for several years.
More recently Robert and I would stand around talking each year at the Medicine Lodge track meet and discuss life. He made fun of my green shirt. I told him “It doesn’t say ‘Pratt’ anywhere on the shirt,” Robert laughed and admitted he had a plain green shirt to wear to baseball games to watch his friends’ son. You see Robert and I had both attended Skyline and my kids attend the rival school in the same town.
I just want to tell Ashton, Alayna, Audra, and Sam that your dad loved you so much. Don’t ever wonder if your dad loved you. He did. Don’t ever wonder if he was proud of you. He was. When he would talk about you his chest would puff up as he would give me little updates on your lives. One of his greatest treasures in life was his grandchildren. He loved how much his little granddaughters looked and acted like their moms, and he loved the drama that they were going to bring into your lives. Robert was also excited for the grandchildren he had not met yet.
I learned that Robert was what I refer to as a ‘faithful reader.’ He read my column faithfully. In fact, I had written a column about meeting his daughter’s roommate from college. She was Allie’s new teacher, in a new town, fresh from California via Sterling College. I noticed that Audra was our one ‘mutual friend’ on Facebook. He cut the article and shared it with people.
How do you sum up the life of someone? Robert knew so many people in the Pratt community and beyond. In just a few sentences, he would start sharing one of his many stories. He had a soft voice and a strong presence. Robert once put a huge smiley face on the Croft road blacktop we lived on. It was fun to drive over the face and wonder who exactly drew it, but I had a pretty good idea. He also loved spicy things. I can remember him explaining to me how much hotter Habanero peppers were than Jalapenos. Since that conversation, I have never wanted anything to do with a Habanero. I think most people who knew Robert were caught off guard with his sudden passing. It’s hard to wrap our heads around an unexpected goodbye, but like the pastor said at the service, “It’s just part of life.” We sat in the same church at his funeral where I had attended his wedding and the weddings of his sisters. I went to his mother’s funeral there also. Thankfully we have a shared faith in the Lord and one day we shall all be reunited.
But let’s get down to the hard stuff. It’s hard to lose a parent at any age, especially when you are young and just starting a family. My daughter recently told me that it wasn’t fair that my grandpa was still alive, but hers wasn’t. I told her she was right, life is not fair. I hope Roberts children can draw on his memory as a source of strength. It’s not fair that they lost their dad, but again, “It’s just part of life.”
I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.
Romans 8:18
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for assurance about what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1
